Sometimes it’s hard to stay all the way clear of negative people. No matter how hard you try to keep a positive circle of influence around you, every now and then a “neg bomb” sneaks it’s way into your circle. A “neg bomb” is a term we use to use at this marketing firm I worked at in 2006. Anytime someone was always complaining or always had something negative to say no matter what, we would classify them as a neg bomb; basically that person is a “Debbie downer” or a pessimist.
I’ve adopted a new phrase that I saw on instagram the other day, anytime I feel someone around me is giving off extremely negative energy on a consistent basis the first thing that comes to mind is “KEEP YOUR MISERABLE ASS AWAY FROM ME.” On a daily basis as human beings we already have plenty of challenges that each and every one of us have to overcome. No matter what your place is in the world or on this earth, life is not perfect for anyone. With that being said, after conquering the daily challenges and putting up with life’s bullshit, who has time to deal with the next unhappy soul giving off negative energy and vibes all day…everyday? If you find yourself with a person or people like this around you, recognize it quickly and dispose of that energy because it’s not healthy for anyone. If every time I talk to you on the phone or in person you’re always upset, mad, angry, complaining, talking negative about other people, situations, yourself or the world, nine times out of ten you’re a “neg bomb” and I’ll be happy to let you explode all by yourself in your special little corner.
For 6 months in 2012 and the beginning of 2013, I worked as a Financial Advisor for an awesome company named NestWise. Even though I didn’t stay there long because the company eventually went out of business, I learned so many things about myself and people during my time there. Also, being with that company made me grow out of my comfort zone tremendously because I was embarking on a career path that I’ve never tapped into. When I was first hired as a new advisor the Vice President gave me a deck of cards that had all these different values written on each card. Examples of what was written on each card were words like: Family, Love, Money, Financial Security, Charity, Freedom, Happiness, etc. He told us to narrow what we value most down to five cards; this exercise was a little hard to me and my colleagues because we felt like all the cards were a value of ours. At the end of the exercise, my VP explained to us that we need to live in alignment on an everyday basis to what we value the most and whatever it is we want most from life. I’ll never forget that exercise we did in the conference room that day and I’ve been trying to keep that as the forefront of my life ever since.
This morning I was having a conversation with a friend of mine I’ve known for the past 6 years and after we hung up I realized I’m going to delete his number and never pick up his calls again. I’m at a point in my life where I only want to surround myself with people that are on the same page as I am as far as wanting to take my life to another level. I really don’t have time for people that say one thing but do another. How can you say you want success but you in the clubs every night? What exactly are you celebrating if you can’t even afford to buy a drink in the club you are partying in? How can you say you’re looking for a wife but in the same breath say you don’t have time to date? I’m guessing a genie will cross their arms, blink twice and a wife will appear in front of you. Yup that’s it!! I’m sure he’s not the only person that wants one thing out of life but is doing the total opposite or nothing at all to get it. I see and hear many people that think their living in alignment with their goals but actually are far from it. I’m not the perfect angel but the first step in living in alignment with your values and goals is taking a step back and doing some self-evaluation. Once that step has been taken, you can then start to live within your truth and take the necessary steps towards living in alignment with everything you value most.
In 2004, Paul Haggis produced and directed the film Crash which is mainly about racial and social tensions in Los Angeles, CA. The film is also about how the lives of the characters in the film interweave with one another because of certain events that take place in their lives. I mention this film because sometimes you have to take a step back and wonder, what does it all mean?
Many times we cross paths with certain people in our lives and don’t realize how the connection we just made has a deeper meaning than what we see in front of us. On the surface it just seems as if we’ve met someone new and have common interests. If not that, sometimes it may just seem as if we’ve cross paths with someone because of a certain event, experience or circumstance. But what if we all played a small but key role in some stranger’s life before we even met them in the flesh and don’t know it? If we could all sit back and watch a movie called “My Life” I’m sure each and every one of us would be pleasantly surprised to see how the connections we made with certain people in our lives was already written and had deeper meanings to them than what we initially thought.
Personally speaking, I think about all the relationships in my life, current and past, friendships, partnerships, business connections, casual connections and romantic relationships and I always think about how did it start and why. I think about the significant role each person either played or is still playing in my life. I also wonder what does it mean for my future.